Wednesday, April 11, 2007

I stand accused

That's a snippet from a terrible 80s song called "love in the first degree". But I am indeed guilty of that.

Had Coffee with Julia today, who asked (with her teutonic acuity) "You don't really want to go back to work do you?". Of course I protested, and cited Sophie's incomplete potty training, the school issue, and so on. But the truth is, I've more or less set up my child care arrangements (2 aiyis in 2 shifts with an hour overlap), and my shipment is 80% set up. So I supposedly can go back to work. But I find it soooo hard.

And here is why - with all 8 teeth (Count them Sandra and Gina!!) :

So - what would you do if you were me?

We don't desperately need the money. But if we want to have a second kid at our currently comfortable standard of life, then we probably should be a double income family. If not, we would have to settle for less material well being. But is that necessarily a bad thing?

I am not an obssessive materialist, but I like our comfortable life, even if I know we don't NEED it in the way that say, a migrant child in a Beijing suburb does. I like having 2 aiyis, and I like paying them both generously. It makes me feel good. It's like going to a restaurant and giving a good tip. Sure the waiter might appreciate it. But yet in absolute moral terms, surely I should have just saved the cost of the meal and given away the entire amount?

I am tired, and I am looking forward to our Korea vacation where my parents can look after Sophie whilst Fabien and I escape for our 2nd wedding anniversary weekend.


Ex Night Queen said...

Aiyoh!!! I just touched a long message and then the connection tripped! Will email you. hmpf!

mini said...

aww she's all grown up! sigh, intimately familiar with the dilemma of how much is enough....

rene said...

I think the moments & experiences with your baby is a priceless one, and for me, that takes precedence over all material goods..i would choose being able to spend time, bring them up over work in a heartbeat..she looks like such a happy tot!

Ex Night Queen said...

Read your later post - Fabien has a point lah. Sophie will grow up one day, and you would also want her to live her normal teenage and working adult life.

BUT - you can work and have your baby and family time. Find something that lets you work from home - which you have done before. Or tutor at some uni there as you have done before - hours will be less I'm sure. Or, teach English ?

Another way of looking at it would be that you have to re-set your whole work clock when you have another you can choose to have more babies now until you are sick of raising kids...get it over and done with at one go...then go sailing into your employment.

And have a law degree many options for you.

By the way...Sophie is now my desktop wallpaper :-))